Adorable Puppy Injury!!!!

Adorable Puppy Injury!!!!

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Hello. I’m not John! *Music* John’s punishment was to do five videos in five days, but unfortunately it looks like he’s not going to do that, because of…! Something. Something I’m not gonna tell you about right now. I don’t know if you know this, but I actually have a version of Question Tuesdays as well. It’s when I answer one of your questions in a very long-winded fashion, and then I ask you, like, twelve questions. It’s little-known, because we’ve never actually done it, but that’s what I do instead of Question Tuesdays. So I’m gonna start with the most frequently asked question I receive. “Dude, how many chocolate-flavored espresso beans did you eat today?!” That’s probably the question that I get the most often. The answer to that question, in every single one of my videos, has been none. In fact, I pretty religiously avoid caffeine. Because as you can imagine, the effects on a guy like me might be a little bit dangerous. But, in order to show you what that’s like, I have here a shot of espresso. With some milk and some water. And some sugar! Which is how I like it. I love the taste of coffee, I just don’t like caffeine. And I’m gonna drink it. And you’re gonna see what happens. How long does it take for caffeine to hit? Uh, Google? About five minutes, with the peak effects at thirty minutes. So, I should be feeling it soon. do-dodo-do *Fake Brittish Accent* I have not yet started to feel the effects of the coffee. Maybe I have! *Back to normal voice* Was that like a little British rap? In the meantime let’s talk about why John’s not here. Unfortunately, John has spent most of the day in the doggie hospital. Oh, not the doggie hospital!!! Willie is okay, don’t worry. But Willie is also, um… adorably injured. This is probably the most adorable broken foot that you’ve ever seen. Here it is. Oh my god. So that’s why John’s excused.
Because his puppy has a peg leg. Just a question of John, can you get an eye patch? And maybe a parrot? An eye patch, at the very least, for tomorrow’s video. I want to see an eye patch in addition to the peg leg. Because while, you know, I’m definitely on team ninja,
a pirate puppy would be pretty awesome. So let’s start with cute, yeah, that’s cute but— but give it a peg leg—yeah— yeah, now, uh, an eyepatch! Yessss. So, while we’re waiting for the caffeine to effect now comes the part of the video— wow the caffeine has taken effect! Now comes the part of the video where I ask you questions! Okay, okay. Resisting urge to bock like a chicken. So since Michigan I’ve been having this problem. I can’t stop thinking about the difference between mono- and uni-. They’re both Latin prefixes…for the same thing! Why aren’t there just monoversities and monotards? “No, he’s monotonous!”
“No, UNotonous!” How come nobody ever dies of carbon unoxide poisoning? Another thing with Latin: Why is trivia “tri-via”? That’s like “three streets”. Three-street pursuit. Also been wondering if there are more murders on TV or in real life. If anybody could let me know, um, excluding wars, are there more murders on TV or in real life? Why do I wanna bock like a chicken?! Ghh! Kh, p. W-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-when, when, when like, I go through airport security and I like, forget my change that I put in a little thingy, what happens to that? Did the people just take it? Or d—like, does it go to the US treasury? Four times I’ve gone through and like, left, you know, 35 cents. And, you know that’s not a big deal for me, but I kinda wanna know what happens to that money! Maybe there should be a t—I think there should be! I think there should be a tip jar for transportation security people. Because that job sucks! I don’t want to bock like a chicken! [Groans] Bock, bock, bock, bock… Can you do anagrams and math? If anybody knows any way to incorporate anagrams into math, I would really like to know about that. Want to know if evil people have pets. Like does, did Hitler have a pet? Or, like, Stalin? If you know about evil people’s pets, let me know. Brk, brk, brk, brk, brk, b’kock. Brrk! Do you want a copy of Paper Towns? Because in this video, I actually get to give one away! This is the first time I’ve gotten to give one away, so I get to give one away. One lucky random commenter will receive one! Awwww!! Just, too much energy in me! What the frick is up with an iota? What is an iota? Why is there only one? Why can you never have two iotas? I don’t care one iota! What the frick does that mean?! If you have answers to any questions at all, including the ones that I’ve just asked, but also including all of the questions in the world, leave them in the comments! I appreciate it! Thank you! Brk. B’grlg John, I’ll see you tomorrow.

100 thoughts on “Adorable Puppy Injury!!!!”

  1. I wonder what it was like for him to edit this! Like, was he looking at himself and laughing at his ability to get hyped up on caffeine? Was he still on his caffeine high when he edited it? Was he debating whether or not to actually post this video? Was he excited for us to see it? Was he embarrassed? THESE QUESTIONS. THEY NEED ANSWERED.

  2. i·o·ta
    noun: iota; plural noun: iotas
    the ninth letter of the Greek alphabet ( Ι, ι ), transliterated as ‘i.’
    the ninth star in a constellation.
    noun: Iota
    "Iota Piscium"
    an extremely small amount.
    "nothing she said seemed to make an iota of difference"
    synonyms: bit, speck, mite, scrap, shred, ounce, scintilla, atom, jot, grain, whit, trace

    (Yeah, this is really late, I know)

  3. As an italian who takes several shots of espresso during the day, i can assure you if that really were espresso coffee you'd be bouncing off the walls

  4. This is almost exactly how I am in the absence of my ADHD medicine and even without caffeine. It's fun on the weekends when stuff starts getting boring.

  5. Annagraming in math is called the associative property which basically means that 2+5=7 is the same as 5+2=7

  6. Hitler had a German Shepard dog that he loved, if he even had the ability to love. He even sometimes took it to work and there are actual videos of him petting her and giving her treats. But he killed her before he killed himself, so that's that

  7. Trivia a 3 road intersection
    No one knew how to run it (like people at stop signs today) it caused the ability to exchange mild gossip and useless facts

  8. Pretty sure that espresso was a chemical cocktail of coffee, Adderall, methamphetamine, Molly, and some 5hour energy as a garnish.

    Never. Do. That. Again.

    However, if fake acting was going on… Disregard all the above

  9. Caffeine is awesome. It makes awesomeness become awesomer. Though I think anymore caffeine and Hank may accidentally destroy the world or something like that.

  10. Hitler had a German Shepard and Stalin had a Spider or a Spaniel (ive heard both) 
    Qaddafi had a Camel
    Caligula had a Horse
    Mao had a cockroach
    Lenin had a cat
    Albert Fish had a bird
    Gilles de Rais owned a Horse
    Javed Iqbal owned a cat
    etc. (because I'm too lazy to research stuff)

  11. Trivia comes from the idea of news. It was the name of information you would get from travelers at crossroads. So the three roads has to do with the crossroads where you would swap news with travelers.

  12. I would like to say that several people did correctly say that trivia come from the roman for where "three roads meet" and that people talked when the met at these roads but there is more then this.

    Trivia comes form a fact that intersects with subjects matters which is way we may find the interesting
    example: Restaurants owner not very interesting, basket ball play somewhat interesting to some people, but restaurant owner Michael Jordan used to play in the NBA very interesting

    also its phrased funny

  13. not an anagram but a cool limeric:
    a dozen, a gross, and a score
    plus three times the square root of four
    that all over seven
    plus five times eleven
    is nine squared and not a bit more

    12+144+20+3(sqrt4) /7 +(5×11)=9^2+0

  14. I'm sure Hank knows this by know, but for people like me watching this later… I don't know about the absolute number of murders, but I do know the murder (and death rate generally) on TV is WAY higher than IRL. The infidelity rate, however, is much much lower. We really don't like being reminded by how often people really cheat.

  15. Technically speaking Psychopaths and Sociopaths (the murderous ones) tend to have pets because they assist them in capturing, torturing, holding, and discarding victims.

  16. Here is my unresearched, unfactchecked, probably wrong, and poorly explained anyway answer to the iota thing, because I think looking it up would be cheating, because if you wanted looked up answers, you would have just done that yourself, plus, I'm pretty sure the right answer must be in the comments already. Ok, so, there was some religious text, and an iota is a letter of some sort, like a t or i, or something, and like, there was one bit in the text where it was unclear whether or not that letter was there, because with or without that letter it still would have been a valid word, and a valid sentence. Now, I don't remember whether this explanation I once heard or read said something about how despite some people thinking it was one way, and others thinking it was the other, that they were still the same religion and it didn't matter, which I think it might have been because that makes it make sense with the saying, but what I think I remember was that the two different meanings people thought were significant and it caused a huge rift in the religion and something something, which is what I remember, but doesn't make sense with the saying, so I must be remembering it wrong… but, as this is all probably wrong to begin with, you should disregard my wall of text, which most of you probably did, because, you know, wall of text.

  17. Hitler had a whole wildlife preserve, including his attempts to revive and extinct cow species. stains pet was whoever was standing next to him at the time, and he would make you do tricks.

  18. And don't forget Hitler's pet alligator "Saturn" which is still alive, and you can visit it in Moscow zoo.

  19. Oh my gosh, younger, more crazy, more dorky, less polished/guarded Hank. Adorable/entertaining/fantastic Hank (this has never changed). And Willie is so cute.

  20. Cameron owned a cat when he was still prime minister. Is Cameron evil? He steered the UK into a catastrophe.

  21. 1) I want Hank to do a video now where he answers all the questions he asked in this video.
    2) God, I hope his child sees this in about ten years.

  22. Played at half speed sounds like what I would sound like if I was drunk. Going off on tangents about latin for no reason.

  23. AHAHAHAHAHAHA hank is hilarious and I'm just literally cracking up and laughing so hard…..this is me on caffeine

  24. Hitler had a dog. He had it during his WWI days. He whipped it with his leash after he escaped when it smelled a bomb- which he didn't know at the time was there. When the bomb exploded, the dog died and Hitler conviniently had meat stew that night, which his co workers told him. He ate it anyway.

  25. apparently "mono" is greek and "uni" is latin, and for some reason their is a preference to at them to words that come from the same language.

  26. The Ancient Egyptians buried animals with their dead kings as added provisions to help them in the afterlife so I'm pretty sure Cleopatra had at least one goat buried with her. You may consider that a pet if you want.

  27. The phrase: “one iota” refers to a disagreement in the early Church between the Catholics and the Arians. The Catholics had created the term “homoousion” to describe the relationship between God the Father and God the Son – namely that they were of the same substance. The Arians wanted to add one iota (that is, one letter) to the word to change it to “homoiousios,” which means similar in substance, thus implying that God he Father and God the Son were fundamentally different. This one iota led to the First Council of Nicaea, which lead to the creation of the Nicaean Creed, so that one iota was kinda a big deal 🙂

  28. Mono–singular alone. Uni–singular collective. Monotone=one tone on its own. Unison= a group speaking at once to sound like a single thing.

  29. Well. it's not an anagram, but:
    A dozen, a gross, and a score; Plus three times the square root of four; Divided by seven; Plus five times eleven; Is nine squared and not a bit more.

  30. At least in Colorado (DIA) the extra change from the bins goes to charity to help benefit homeless individuals by improving shelter conditions and making them not homeless anymore.

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